Waiting……

by | Jul 22, 2021

Today is 13 days since I had my biopsy and I am still waiting for the results and plan that will determine my next days and months.  The plan will be what will ensure my body beats the crap out of whatever this is out of my body for good.

So much has happened in those 13 days: a friend shared he carried me with him, my initials on his arm, as he completed Hardrock 100, two longtime friends sat with me for over three hours offering their help and guidance whenever I need it, a friend shared the story of his wife’s battle with uterine cancer, and how she beat it and a very Godly friend shared her journey through lymphoma and the ways God carried her through.  I am grateful to all these friends for being there at the most appropriate time.  I know it was planned for me to meet them and have those conversations.  The peace it brought to my fears is unimaginable.  I love you all

Yesterday I looked in the patient portal for my doctor and saw what I think are the results from my biopsy.   I didn’t read them because I really don’t know what I would take from them.  I would probably find myself on google reading the most horrible way that my life was going to end.  Plus, the results won’t tell me what the plan will be, only my doctor will do that.  On the advice of another friend who has courageously  battled through four cancer diagnosis, I sent a note to my doctor asking if she had all the results back yet.  It felt good to acknowledge whatever it is inside of me but it also felt good to know that the plan is about to be revealed to me.

I thought After seeing results in the portal I would be awake all night last night writhing in worry and fear.  That was not the case.  I actually had the best night sleep I had in a long time.  Usually when I wake in the morning I have discomfort on my lower abdomen and cramping.  This morning there was nothing but peace, peace that a plan is coming, peace that I have some of the best friends in my corner for support and peace that God will be there to carry me through it all.

 

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Please send donations in Tara's memory to:

The Appendix Cancer Pseudomyxoma Peritonei Research Foundation or a charity that is important to you.