Tuesday

by | Jan 25, 2022

Today is a day of so many mixed feelings, good and bad.  I am still trying to recover from my surgery on Friday and get back into the groove of working a full work week. So far I am doing well.

Last Thursday, my good friend Kim passed away from MBC.  When Kim was diagnosed, she was told she would not see her daughters graduate kindergarten, they were 1 and 3 at the time.  Kim lived long enough not only to see both of them graduate from elementary school, middle school and her oldest from high school and off to college, She is a sophomore.  When one reads Kim’s obituary it is hard not to be amazed by the many many hearts she touched while travelling her cancer journey. Kim was a beautiful spirit and now she lives with Shari, who passed shortly before her in July 2021.  Both ladies had such a positive impact on me and I hope to be be as much of  a positive spirit as they were.

So Friday – Friday was the day of my laparoscopic procedure.  The plan for the day was to get in and see if what the CT scan was telling them was correct.  They would make three small incisions and insert a camera and probe to look around.  If they thought is would be safe while they were looking around they would attempt to take out my right ovary. I also asked the doctor to drain what ever fluid he could find as I was starting to feel really uncomfortable.

Everything was right on track and I still had positive hopes for a good outcome.  Post surgery I got to speak with the surgeon about what he found.  First, I found out I had 9 liters of fluid that was drained off, 9 liters!  No wonder I was having a hard time breathing. It also meant an overnight visit for me so they could keep an eye on my blood pressure.  At one point in the middle of the night it was 90/86. Second, the doc told me he was fairly certain my primary location was the appendix.  Great I thought, let’s take that out.  Well apparently my appendix is no longer inside my body.  The surgeon told Eric there were no signs or evidence my appendix ever existed.  What the heck?  I never heard anything so crazy before.  Third, and probably the most upsetting news is there is too much cancer right not to do the big surgery.  They looked at the ovary but said it was in a cake like substance and not safe to remove.

How am I feeling?  I am really tired, having a hard time sleeping, uncertain for my future and tired of the neuropathy side effects.  I have become a thing dropper and yesterday I dropped a place and cut my finger open.  But I am encouraged by the love of my friends and family.  I found I am not really a phone talker so started asking friends to just stop over.  A little challenging with covid but I really enjoy the personal connection.

Time to go recover!

Today’s gratitude – waking up to a beautiful morning with Eric and Luke in my home, for doctors who are experienced enough to perform laparoscopic procedures and opportunities to share my feelings with friends and family

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