Some thoughts and details on final arrangements

by | Jun 23, 2022

The walking bridge over the Delaware at Lumberville was a special place for Tara and I.  We crossed that bridge many, many times over the years on bike rides and runs and always stopped in the middle to share a kiss.  If there were turtles hanging out on the bridge piers she made time to say Hi to them, too.

I wasn’t sure how I’d ever cross that bridge again.  A friend told me I’d just have to do it (he added some words that aren’t appropriate for this post but were absolutely appropriate for getting me to get back there).  I made myself drive to the bridge this morning.  I was going to go on a short bike ride but the rain made me skip the ride…and was exactly what I needed.  With the rain, I had the bridge to myself.  I talked to Tara and I cried enough that the river probably rose a bit.  I promised her that I’d cross that bridge without her but I’d always stop to remember her.

I was listening to some music and heard one song with new ears this morning.  It was the Grateful Dead song, Stella Blue.  Tara had named her new bike Stella Blue so it seemed appropriate.  Here are the lyrics with the impactful ones in bold:

All the years combine
They melt into a dream
A broken angel sings
From a guitar
In the end there’s just a song
Comes crying like the night (wind)
Through all the broken dreams
And vanished years

Stella Blue

When all the cards are down
There’s nothing left to see
There’s just the pavement left
And broken dreams
In the end there’s still that song
Comes crying like the wind
Down every lonely street
That’s ever been

Stella Blue

I’ve stayed in every blue-light cheap hotel
Can’t win for trying
Dust off those rusty strings just
One more time
Gonna make em shine

It all rolls into one
And nothing comes for free
There’s nothing you can hold
For very long
And when you hear that song
Come crying like the wind
It seems like all this life
Was just a dream
Stella Blue
There are broken dreams for many of us now.  Time without Tara is unimaginable for me and so many others.  But we will hear her song.  The pavement will be left and it will be a place to remember Tara.  If you ride or run or walk take some time to think about her.
ARRANGEMENTS:

Visitation will be held at the Varcoe-Thomas Funeral Home, 344 North Main Street, Doylestown, PA 18901
on Sunday, June 26
th from 2:00-4:00 pm
and Monday, June 27
th from 5:00-8:00 pm.

The family will receive friends and family at the Doylestown Presbyterian Church, 127 East Court Street, Doylestown, PA 18901 on Tuesday, June 28th from 10:00-11:00 am with a celebration of Tara’s life to begin at 11:00 am.

In lieu of flowers, memorial gifts to the Appendix Cancer Psuedomyxoma Peritoneal Research Foundation to fund research would be appreciated. Visitation will be held at the Varcoe-Thomas Funeral Home, 344 North Main Street, Doylestown, PA 18901 on Sunday, June 26th from 2:00-4:00 pm and Monday, June 27th from 5:00-8:00 pm. The family will receive friends and family at the Doylestown Presbyterian Church, 127 East Court Street, Doylestown, PA 18901 on Tuesday, June 28th from 10:00-11:00 am with a celebration of Tara’s life to begin at 11:00 am. In lieu of flowers, memorial gifts to the Appendix Cancer Psuedomyxoma Peritoneal Research Foundation to fund research would be appreciated. https://acpmp.org/get-involved/donate/

I’ll stress the “in lieu of flowers” part here. Since Tara’s diagnosis, she hasn’t wanted flowers around (if you sent flowers or dropped them off know that she saw the love in those flowers).  I think she had a vision of her funeral and wanted to keep that from her mind.  I know some folks will still send flowers and that those will be sent with love.
Tara’s diagnosis was appendix cancer.  That’s exceptionally rare with somewhere around 1000 cases a year in the US.  I can safely say that Tara would rather have donations that may help others down the road than flowers.  If you don’t donate to the organization we’ve chosen please donate to a charity that’s important to you.  Tara would love that.

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Please send donations in Tara's memory to:

The Appendix Cancer Pseudomyxoma Peritonei Research Foundation or a charity that is important to you.